PAUL
I DON’T KNOW HOW TO MANUFACTURE A STORY
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
CHORUS
WE CAN HELP YOU
JUST FOLLOW OUR LEAD
IT’S LIKE DANCING
TRY TO KEEP UP TO SPEED
FIRST YOU FIND YOUR PARTNER
THE AUDIENCE WILL DO
NEXT YOU PICK THE LEADER
AND THAT IS ALWAYS YOU
DON’T START OUT TOO FAST
YOU NEED TO SET THE SCENE
TELL IT TO THEM NICELY
THEY’LL NOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN.
THAT’S THE REPORTER RUMBA
WE’VE BEEN DOING IT FOR YEARS
THAT’S THE REPORTER RUMBA
AT FIRST IT BROUGHT ME TO TEARS
IF YOU DO THE REPORTER RUMBA
YOU’LL FIND A JOB BEHIND ANY DOOR
IF YOU DO THE REPORTER RUMBA
YOU SOMETIMES FEEL LIKE A WHORE
NOW YOU’RE READY TO HOOK THEM
AND MAKE THEM WANT TO STAY
TELL THEM A JUICY DETAIL
THEY DON’T HAVE ALL DAY.
IF YOU TEASE THEM NICELY
THEY’LL FOLLOW YOU ANYWHERE
JUST DON’T LIE TOO BLUNTLY
THAT WOULD BE TOO MUCH TO BARE
IT’S THE REPORTER RUMBA
WE’VE GOT TO KEEP THEM WATCHING
IT’S THE REPORTER RUMBA
JUST GIVE THEM SOMETHING SHOCKING
WHEN YOU DO THE REPORTER RUMBA
YOU CAN’T REST ON YOUR LAURELS
WHEN YOU DO THE REPORTER RUMBA
YOU CAN LOOSEN YOUR MORALS
NOW IT’S YOUR TURN TO WRITE IT
AND SHOW HOW GOOD YOU ARE
DRAW ME IN WITH THE STORY
BECAUSE I HAVEN’T BEEN IMPRESSED SO FAR.
WHETHER YOU HAVE FACTS OR NOT
THE STORY IS THE HEART
SO WRITE THE COPY
AND DON’T SCREW UP YOUR PART